We always want to provide whatever we can to our kids. We never want to see our children disappointed. But sometimes they tend to cross limits with their demands. So, we should set some healthy boundaries for our kids. Setting boundaries early in life will teach them what’s expected of them in the real world once they grow up. This will make their life a lot easier.
So, here are 10 simple ways you can set boundaries for your kids:
Give clear and direct rules:
When giving instructions to your child, tell them in a clear way. So that they don’t get confused. If you make clear rules for your child, it will be easier for them to follow through, and they will be less likely to cross the line.
For example, instead of saying, why didn’t you hold my hand from the parking lot to the toy store? to your kids, say please hold my hand always while going to the store from the parking lot. The latter one is direct and your child will understand that you are serious about the rule.
Be consistent throughout:
Be consistent in your rules. For example, if you say, no TV while having a meal. It has to be followed every time. If this rule is not followed all the time, then your child might think that you are not serious. And he will not respect your rule.
Keep instructions brief:
Don’t have a long conversation with your kids about why it’s bad to not brush their teeth before bed. They will not be able to comprehend it and remember it the next time. Instead, give them some consequence for not following it. For instance, tell them if they don’t brush their teeth 2 times a day, then they have to go to the dentist. Going to a dentist is not a very good experience for a child. So, they will be more likely to follow the rules if you point out to them the consequence.
Establish effective communication:
There should not be any miscommunication between you and your child. Teach your kids to convey their thoughts and opinions in a clear manner to you. Ask them to communicate respectfully their needs with you. And whenever you give them some instructions, ask them to repeat back to you so that it’s understood fully.
Follow through with the consequences:
Stay firm by the decisions you have made for the child. If they break the rules, let them face the consequences every time. Don’t worry about your child being upset. You may want to withdraw whatever you’ve said or done to make your child feel better. But it will only indicate to your child that you are not serious about the limits. And they might act rebel against you in the future.
Recognize your child’s appropriate behaviour:
Recognize and praise your child when they’ve done something good. Positive reinforcement is a good way to maintain a child’s good behaviour. Kids always love to receive positive feedback from their parents. They will thus be more motivated to do the things within the boundaries to get positive feedback again.
Stop labeling kids as ‘good’ or ‘bad’:
Never label your kids as good kids or bad kids. There are only acceptable and unacceptable behaviours. Labeling a child as bad will only affect their self-image.
So, never do it.
Always remind them that you are the authority:
Never let forget your kids that you are the boss in the house. If you don’t set clear limits in the house, then your kids might feel insecure. Kids should be given boundaries to provide them with a sense of security. For example, if a child can always convince their parents to get whatever they want, they will think that they are more powerful than their parents. As a result, it will make them insecure and anxious because of too much autonomy in the house. Thus they have to be reminded always that the parents are the boss in the house.
Have family rules:
There must be some family rules in the house which have to be followed. For example, no TV during meal time, always holding the hand of the parents while crossing the road, etc. If there is some rule that the kid thinks it’s unfair, hear about it. But make sure they are conveying their message in a respectful way.
Never divide among you and the other parent:
Never tell your kid about something and ask him not to tell the other parent. This will only indicate to your child that you and your partner are divided. Always be together in each and every matter.
That’s it for how to set healthy boundaries with your child. I hope that you’ve gained some value from the above tips. Were you aware of these methods of controlling your child? And if not, tell me in the comment section which of these ways you are excited to apply in your kid’s life.
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